Month: June 2019

Resilience in a Congregation – 5 signs

Resilience testers for a congregation

Sooner or later all congregations experience challenges. These challenges are often caused by different factors. Whatever the cause they can test our confidence that we can deal with them wisely. Our resilience can be tested!!

Perhaps your congregation has experienced one of these difficult situations:

  • Shifting realities force a decision between 2 choices such as moving forward in a new direction for ministry or returning to the ways of the past.
  • Dealing with differing views between 2 or more strong-willed individuals that often results in an escalating conflict.
  • Having a storm or freak act of nature destroy your church building and then having to work through grief in order to rebuild.
  • Losing a beloved Pastor who has led your congregation for many years, perhaps through death or moving to a new placement.
  • Realizing that your congregation is losing members and becoming smaller each year but you don’t know what to do about it.

How these situations are handled can test the resiliency of a congregation. They are an indicator of their ability to bounce back stronger.

What is Resilience?

Resilience is the ability of an organization to overcome challenges (hard choices, trauma, tragedy, crises, or simply life’s problems), and come through them stronger, wiser, and even more powerful. The ability to bounce back and make repairs after being stretched, compressed or almost destroyed is the hallmark of a resilient group.

Indicators of Resilience

Here are 5 signs that your group is resilient. Each of these signs describes the very heart and soul of your organization. These characteristics can be developed intentionally. However, they cannot be ignored if you are serious about the wellbeing of your congregation or group.

 1.  A Clear, Compelling Vision

When a congregation knows where it is headed and what is important to their very life and mission, there is energy and purpose. A clear vision draws people together. It points to the future that God intends for them. It fosters a commitment to meet God in the days to come in fresh, renewing methods that brings life.

In my work with congregations, I am often amazed at how many do not understand what pulls them together into the next stage of their ministry. Often, these congregations rely on things that they have done in the past. It is as though the world around them has not changed.

Sadly, there are congregations out there that act as if they wake up tomorrow and it’s 1950 – they are ready to reach that world! Sounds silly, right? Yet these congregations are putting a sincere effort into reaching a world that is no longer there. Why? Because the world is changing.

A good vision is based firmly in the reality of where you are located. Your context. When was the last time you looked at the demographics of your community to understand who lives near you? Do you honestly know what the needs of those groups are? Do you offer ministries that meet those needs? Are you proactive in offering new ways to disciple children, youth and adults or stuck in the methods that have worked in the past?

I once attended a church that wanted to offer a Vacation Bible School (VBS) in the summer for children in their community. (They had not offered this program in 15 years!) I watched them plan an event from 9 a.m. to noon that would last a week. Fliers were put out in the community gathering spots to advertise the theme and times. An excellent curriculum was chosen, teachers were trained, and finally, they were ready.  Imagine how disappointed they were on the first day when only 7 children attended (and, they were grandchildren of the staff!)

What happened?

Would you believe the parents in that community worked during the day? So, they had enrolled their young children in daycare near where they were employed. In many households, both adults worked. A month after the VBS, we held a listening circle with some of these parents. There we learned that they would have attended an evening program or one held on a Saturday. Energy and resources were squandered just because they did not know who they were trying to reach! Resilience is being able to come back from that first disappointment!

2.  A Curious Sense of Humor

It’s true: a group that can laugh together has the attitude to weather all sorts of storms. Yes, life happens. People make mistakes. Yet, the power to be curious and look honestly at oneself offers a buoyancy that can help you rise above life’s challenges.

I have witnessed groups over the years get so tied up in a situation that they can not see God active in the midst of the situation. This robs them of the joy to weather life’s storms.

Having a sense of humour is not the same as laughing at everything or one another. The humour I look for in a group is the joy that explains their outlook: we’re on an adventure together seeking to follow God faithfully! There will be dips and bumps on the road but we will get through them together because we trust God.

3.  A Learning Heart

Yes, there are Pastors and Church staff out there that are well trained.  However, most of their education stopped with their ordination or initial employment.

Resilient leaders are curious to discover what works today to reach people for Christ. Therefore, they attend training, read books, or advance their continuing education with a mentor or coach. Specifically, they are able to empathize with visitors and newcomers. They can place themselves in their shoes to experience what the church feels like for others.

They assess ministry. Evaluate. Improve.

I know a Pastor who is retiring early because she no longer understands how to reach the people in her community. She truly thought that she learned everything she would ever need to know for her career at Seminary. Sadly, she stopped being curious about new methods to successfully make disciples.  For her, considering new options disrespected the past.

I get it: you may be thinking that there are tried and true ways of doing things and you simply don’t mess with these methods. Right? Wrong! We must remember that in changing environments like today, the leaders who excel are those who consider options wisely without feeling that they are disrespecting the past if they adjust.

In church seminars, I often talk about the things that endure in ministry:  our mission, values, and guiding principles/theology. These things never change – they are our backbone. Then I explain that there are also things that can change so the organization can endure with effectiveness: vision, goals and methods. These are our muscles to stretch and grow. Resilience comes from understanding what to hold on to and what to let go.

Congregations that have a curious heart for learning know how to honestly assess how well they are doing with their plans and make the necessary adjustments to stay on track. They spend time in meetings asking the vital question: did we accomplish our goals? What are we learning?

4.  A Forgiving Nature

Having the humility to acknowledge that we are only human and make mistakes is essential for resilient organizations. These groups understand that they are loved by God while acknowledging there is room for improvement.

In pastoral workshops, I often give participants a clean QTIP and tell them to “quit taking it personally” (QTIP). There are leaders who take criticism personally and beat themselves up over things that must be put in perspective. While I take ministry seriously, I stopped taking it personally a long time ago because I realized that I was not the Messiah. Further, that risen saviour reconciles me with God (warts and all).

I grow concerned when I work with a congregation that is really being rough on their leaders. Harsh words, disrespectful behaviour, and alienation reign in churches that do not show resilience. They actually foster competition for resources and demean innovation. Sound familiar?

The first step in turning this situation around is being authentic and saying: “I’m sorry” when you make a mistake. Doing this and asking for forgiveness is essential. Leaders that can do this with integrity also go one step further: they love people for who they are and not for what they can do for you. They are able to be compassionate and caring no matter what.

Do you have a forgiving nature?

5.  Living into God’s Blessings

This characteristic is simply the icing on the resilient cake. Whenever I find myself in difficult situations I count my blessings. Hopefully, this doesn’t sound corny to you. I sincerely get a piece of paper and write down all the good things that I see in the midst of crisis or challenge.

Resilient congregations frequently do an audit of their blessings in the midst of difficult situations. Therefore they list the many blessings that God has given them. It is an amazing act of faith in the midst of life’s challenges.

God embeds within each of us spiritual gifts and the fruit of the spirit that carries us through whatever we face. So, when I realize that I am blessed by God I’m able to face any situation. This carries me through difficulties with grace. I find that I often make my best choices and am even able to celebrate God’s goodness with dignity.

So it is with congregations showing resilience. They are able to take stock of the many assets that will get them beyond stressful times toward a new, brighter future.

This means that instead of trying to compete with a church down the street and copy their ministry, they discern a way to be faithful based on what they have to offer. However, resilient congregations are like treasure chests filled with God’s grace. Treasure is intended not to hoard unto themselves but to give away to a hurting world.

Be a blessing to others by generously giving of yourself to connect people to God in fresh ways (yes, even if it means to change!)

Conclusion

So, how resilient are you? After reading about the 5 factors that lead to a resilient organization, which characteristics do you practice well?  Where is there room for improvement?

At makingchurchdecisions.com we are available to coach leaders toward increasing their resilience factor.  Drop us an email and we can discuss coaching options that are affordable and accessible.

Happy Birthday Church!

Happy Birthday Church

This post was written on Pentecost Sunday in celebration of the church faithful who down through the ages has been a sign of God’s faithfulness to us when we gather as a people, called.

Think of your favorite party…

The odds are high that when you saw the heading for this post, you thought of a birthday party.  Perhaps it was a surprise party that your friends organized to let you know how special you are to them. Perhaps it was the birthday party of a family member that has had an important role in your life. Whatever the occasion, we mark the passing of our years on the annual date of our birth.  Usually, with some fanfare and gifts!

When we have parties with the family the chances are that there will be people who we like more than others. Families have differences but we make the effort to get along – especially at parties!

And, so it is with the church!

Pentecost is the liturgical day of the year when we celebrate God pouring out his spirit on the early church. Miraculously, the story recorded in Acts 2 tells of the sign of the Spirit coming upon the first disciples in a way that allowed them to share the good news of Jesus Christ in a way that all people understood for they heard it in their own language. It is the job description for the church!

Reversing the experience at the Tower of Babel, Pentecost made it possible for people to understand each other. The Holy Spirit brought people together as they listened and understood what was being said. What can we do today that will foster genuine listening rather than talking at people without understanding?

From the very beginning of the Christian church, people have responded to the gospel by allowing God to change their lives into the image of Christ (or, at least we espouse to do so). What does it mean to live in the image of Christ in our Church communities? What does it mean to truly listen and understand one another? How is the Pentecost vision shaoing the way that we talk to each other?

Our calling is to take care of one another and generously give to those in need. Teresa of Avalon once talked about this phenomenon of the church gathering for mission to remind us that we are the very arms and feet of Christ embracing the world with God’s hug. I like that image very much. Could it be possible that the way we treat other people is a sign of the way God loves us?

And yet, the Church’s story has not always been so gracious.  Recall the pain caused by the Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, persecution of the Jews, the Salem Witch Trials and today’s bashing of people based on their sexual orientation. No, these are not our finest hours.

So,  Why Bother?

Despite being imperfect and falling short of the glory of God, we continue to try and live into God’s expectations for us in this world.  We are called to be peacemakers and reconcile the world unto Christ.  How are we doing church? What processes do you use in your congregations that make peace and foster reconciliation among your members?

Recently I talked with a young adult who had decided not to attend church because the congregation he visited were a bunch of hypocrites. He believed – but he just didn’t want to belong. It has been said that a hospital is not ashamed of being full of sick people. In a similar way, why should the church be ashamed that it is full of sinners?  Indeed!

No, we are not perfect yet we serve one who is. This Christ we seek to serve can take our foibles and imperfections and transform the world. It is the only thing that ever has and the only thing that ever will!

We yearn to be all that God has in store for us knowing that Christ loves us just the way we are and calls us into more than we can ever dream of becoming. How do you show that you love people just the way that they are? Being genuinely interested in the experiences, feelings and views of the people who are different to us is a way to do this. Listening – using consensus building approaches is a Christ-like gift of respect and love.

And, if Christ loves us (warts and all), how can we do less than accept one another despite our preconceived judgments and criticisms? I was once told that God loves us just as we are, and sees us as redeemed despite ourselves. God chooses to love. Sadly, so many of our church members have preconceived ideas about other people and react to them without seeing people for who they are. Pentecost, with the gift of the Holy Spirit, is to open us up to difference and the embrace of the other.

Come, Holy Spirit!

This year has been a serious challenge to my faith in the church.  I have watched my denomination fight publically with each other in ways that made me cringe. At the heart of the debate is the full inclusion of LGBTIQ people in the life and witness of the church.

There has been deliberate manipulation, power plays, one-upmanship, and even righteousness misplaced. Distressed, I have questioned my commitment to remaining a member. Yet each time I have made the decision to leave, God has gently called me back – reminding me that I also stand in need of grace and reconciliation. And so I stay… Why?  Because God’s best hope for this world continues to be through people just like you and me.

This is why I am engaged in this ministry of consensus-based discernment – because it provides the tools we need if we are going to live as the family that God makes possible through the gift of the Holy Spirit.

So,  the next time you are tempted to give up and leave the church, take a deep breath and feel God’s love wash over you. Feel God’s love supporting you. Know that God is in control not this side or that view. Then, share that love with others as best as you can, despite how unloving this world can be. Be an instrument of God’s peace.

Come, Holy Spirit! Come!