Questions that foster conversation

Preparing for meetings – questions matter!

When preparing for an important meeting, most leaders focus their valuable time on preparing the agenda and ensuring that the workspace is ready for participants.  As important as these tasks are to the success of the meeting, there is another task just as important – if not more so. Selecting a good question to guide a conversation and support healthy decision making. In fact, the right questions foster vital conversation and connection!

Asking the right question is not always easy. Some questions are better than others. Sometimes they shut down conversation and creativity.  Questions can create winners and losers by dividing the group.  Often a question is closed – leaving only a “yes” or “no” response available. Yet, the best question will move us beyond a simple “yes” or “no” answer to surface our shared feelings, facts, experience and impact. Learning the difference and applying the lessons will make you a better leader.

Review the following categories of questions and examples to use with your leadership group when working through your next important issue. These questions can foster synergistic conversation and lead to creative options as you search for decisions.

Types of Questions

There are 4 basic types of question that you can ask:

1.  Objective

2.  Reflective

3.  Interpretive

4.  Decision

A good discussion will use each of these types of questions to guide the conversation.

Objective Questions

Objective questions focus on data and facts.  They help focus people’s attention on the relevant details to be considered when making a decision. Here are some examples of an objective question.

  • What opportunities can you see in this situation?
  • Are there assumptions that we need to test or challenge here in thinking about this matter?
  • Why is it important to us to make this decision at this time?
  • Who will be affected by this decision?

Reflective questions

A reflective question will help people get in touch with their internal response to the issue before them for consideration.  Here are a couple of examples:

  • What opportunities can you see in this situation?
  • Is there a part of this proposal that makes you feel like cheering?  Excites you?
  • In a word:  what does it feel like to be in this situation?
  • Does this proposal makes you angry? Sceptical? Frustrated?
  • What does this proposal accomplish for you? Why is it important?
  • Share what has real meaning for you from what you have heard so far?  Have you been surprised?  How? What challenged you?
  • As you make this decision – what values do you hold dear ?

Interpretive Questions

An interpretive question helps make sense or give meaning to the proposal under consideration.  Here are a couple of examples:

  • What is the intent of this proposal?  Please tell us what you see as the key points?
  • What additional questions does this proposal raise for you?  How would you answer them?
  • Will this proposal accomplish its purpose?
  • What has been your/our major learning, insight, or discovery so far?
  • If this proposal is to get your support, what changes do you recommend?
  • What needs our immediate attention going forward?
  • What are the pros and cons of this option?
  • Does this option deal effectively with the issue before us?

Decision Questions

Decision questions draw you closer to a resolution by naming the implications for this new direction.  Some questions in this category include:

  • Share with us what you think it would take to create change on this issue?
  • In this proposal what are you willing to commit to accomplishing?
  • What does this proposal call forth from us?  What is it beckoning us to be or do?
  • How can we support one another in taking the next steps? Can you tell us what contribution you are willing to make?
  • What is the impact of this decision on our life?  What consequences will you need to be prepared to face?

Healthy conversations are nurtured!

It is important to devote adequate time to choosing or crafting questions that can support a group deliberating together on an important matter.  Most leaders simply put a proposal before a group with the words:  “well, what do you think?”  This doesn’t help a group to discuss the heart and soul of an issue or to make a decision that they can live with in the future.

Take adequate time in selecting the questions that will guide your group as it makes its next decision.  Be sure that they include conversation starters that focus on facts, feelings, relations and implementation.  This way you will not need to revisit decisions at a later time for reconsideration.

 

 

 

 

1000 people tried consensus – how did it go?

WCRC General Council Logo 2017

The World Communion of Reformed Churches took a huge risk by using consensus as their way of discernment and decision-making. Around a 1,000 people met as the General Council in Leipzig June / July 2017 and consensus was new to the vast majority. How did it go?

What the Participants said

Martin Engles

Martin Engles
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      Amy Eckert wrote a comprehensive article on the process, its goals and values. In it she interviewed a number of participants. Here are some of their observations.

      Within the small groups the real work of discernment takes place. “Discernment truly is more about listening than speaking,” said Gradye Parsons. “It is important to listen to what others are saying. It is important to listen to what God is saying. And it’s important to consider your own thoughts with regard to the issue and in light of what you have heard.”

      Rev. Lucy Wambui Waweru, minister of the Presbyterian Church of East Africa serving the Nyeri Church in central Kenya, values very much the input that ordinary delegates have on the process within the small groups.

      “Discernment Groups include voices from around the world,” she said. “The groups also have a mix of older, more seasoned ecumenists as well as younger delegates. And every voice is heard.”

      What is different?

      Rev. Annedore Held Venhaus, minister in the Evangelical La Plata Church in Tres Arroyos, Argentina, really likes the notion of the colored cards. “I like how the cards express a feeling, not a decision,” she said. “I feel warm to this idea, I feel cool to it. I found that very interesting.”

      “Just because I raise my orange card doesn’t mean I know that my home church will accept the proposal,” she said, “and it doesn’t mean I know how my home church will implement it. My orange card only means that I believe God is calling us to journey in this direction. It’s all about a willingness to begin a process.”

      Rev. Annedore Held Venhaus, minister in the Evangelical La Plata Church in Tres Arroyos, Argentina, really likes the notion of the colored cards. “I like how the cards express a feeling, not a decision,” she said. “I feel warm to this idea, I feel cool to it. I found that very interesting.”

      Waweru agreed. She also appreciated that giving consensus did not mean that a delegate was 100% supportive or opposed to a proposal. Nor did it mean that the delegate envisioned a clear path toward adoption of the new proposal.

      “Just because I raise my orange card doesn’t mean I know that my home church will accept the proposal,” she said, “and it doesn’t mean I know how my home church will implement it. My orange card only means that I believe God is calling us to journey in this direction. It’s all about a willingness to begin a process.”

      If you were at the General Council of WCRC we would love to hear your comments. Also any questions are very welcome.

      You can read the whole article on the WCRC website.

      5 questions to ask when thinking about moving to consensus based discernment

       

       

      Making big changes requires planning. One way to develop a plan is to ask some basic questions around what you are thinking of doing. If you are thinking of moving your local church Board, congregation, or committee to consensus based discernment then I expect that you have a lot of questions. Be sure to leave your questions at the end of this post. We would love to have a chance to respond to them

      Exactly what questions you have will be affected by your context and how far along you are towards abandoning the failed parliamentary style of decision-making. Most people will have a lot more than 5 questions. But let’s make a start with 5. I suggest that you begin by thinking of your questions in terms of what, who, when, where, how.

      What do I want to achieve?

      Are you clear on your goals for making the change? If you do not have a compelling, motivating narrative to share with others then you will struggle to bring people along with you. So before you answer the “what” question think and read about the benefits of a consensus based discernment process. Then focus on the spiritual outcomes and Christian character of this discernment process. But hey, it’s your story. I’d love to hear what your motivations are at the end of post.

      Who will I work with to bring change?

      You are not alone in your desire for change. Identify the people around you who have a similar yearning for a more authentically Christian, respectful, inclusive, culturally relevant, effective and efficient process for your church meetings. Talk to them about your hopes. Listen to theirs. Encourage and build each other up Work as part of a team for change. Going out on your own may be necessary in some situations but it isn’t Plan A.

      This journey may be new to you but there are leaders from all around the world who have been on this path before you. This website, its blogs, our training events, our Facebook page (@makingchurchdecisions) are among the places where these leaders meet, support and share experiences and ideas. Reach out to people through these avenues and be part of our community of learning and encouragement. Post a request or question at the end of this blog.

      When will I make a start?

      Start when you have done your homework and the Spirit leads you. Know why you are proposing a change. Gather around you a local team who share your vision. Develop your knowledge so that you can articulate and implement an alternative process.

      But don’t wait until you know everything that there is to know before venturing into using the principles and tools of consensus building discernment. Once you understand the core principles then it is possible to design a meeting process that uses them. The techniques vary a little in their complexity depending on the size and type of group but mostly they are quite simple. Any local church Committee, Board or congregational meeting can use consensus building techniques – so give it a go as soon as you can.

      Where will I try consensus building discernment?

      Lead where you have the opportunity to lead. Some of you will be leading in small groups and others in regional, state wide or national contexts. God has called you into leadership in that place so that’s where you can change to a more healthy, life giving discernment process.

      Mostly I recommend that people walk before they run. Whatever the size and complexity of your context there will be places that are more simple and easier to change. So you might build up your experience in Committees or Boards. If you lead Districts or Presbyteries you don’t have to run the whole meeting using a new process the first time that you introduce it. Just use a different process for one or two pieces of business.

      A consensus building approach to discernment can be accommodated in any church’s polity or system of government. Just use the process to build as much consensus as possible and when necessary shift to the conventional way of making the decision. You can use consensus building discernment in your setting.

      How will I do it?

      Prayerfully, carefully, respectfully develop a vision for what is possible, identify others whom the Holy Spirit is leading and work with them. Then make some suggestions about how your meetings might be run differently.

      Sometimes the challenge is how to get a conversation for change on to the agenda of a group. Several easy ways to start a conversation include:

      •     hold a leader’s retreat on the spiritual practice of group discernment
        • in your annual Board review of its performance as a Board include questions about which meeting processes people feel good about or not, and why
        • devotions at a meeting could look at texts like 1 Corinthians 12: 4-7 and members asked what the implications are for their meeting practice
        • write a case study on a meeting that went particularly badly and unpack why it was so and explore what other options would have led to a better result
        • Do you have any other ideas – please share them at the end of the post.

      Five questions

      Just fill in the blanks by answering these questions.

      What do I want to achieve?

      Who can I work with?

      When will I make a start?

      Where will I try out my new ideas?

      How will I go about bringing in change?

      Ask your questions at the end of the post and they may lead to a future blog topic.